This is Riddikulus.

It’s 6 in the morning and I’m awake blogging about a nightmare. Must be important.

Details are blurry but what I can remember is I was in my dead grandmother’s old house in Klang with my bestfriend and another girl with long black hair I don’t recognize. We were bringing in the groceries from the car to the house when suddenly this demon (that surprisingly reminds me of my mother O_O) with sunken eyes and wild hair starts going on a rampage. Our only choice of weapon to defend ourselves is a cleaver. The demon somehow gets a hold of our cleaver and slashes the other girl in front of my eyes.

I start to think to myself that it’s over when my best friend turns around and starts walking menacingly to me. Turns out she was the demon all along. An odd fear rushes through my body as I realize I’m next in line to die. I run away from her, thinking of ways to save myself. I see the cleaver on the floor. I move to grab it and fling it out of the house into the bushes. See, the demon can’t slash me if it can’t find the cleaver. But how was I to know the demon had telekinesis and could summon the cleaver out of the bushes? The demon is now hovering in front of me, cleaver in hand ready to slash and kill me. My mind starts racing. How do I defeat this thing?! Then, as if an afterthought occured, I think “Oh right, I have Jesus!” So I start saying his name, “Jesus! Jesus!

Nothing happened. Demon still there.

“Maybe I’m saying it wrong.”  I think to myself. So I scream, “Hey-sus! Yeh-sus! Jey-sus! Isa! Jehovah!”

Demon still floating there. Something’s not right.

Oh wait, it doesn’t make sense to just say His name, I should say a bible verse, right?”

My mind goes blank for what seemed like an eternity. I can’t think of a single bible verse to help me. Panic starting to rise, my eyes fall on the cleaver in her hand and I blurt out the first bible verse that pops in my head,

No weapon formed against me shall prosper.”

That was it. I couldn’t think of any other bible verse! And I couldn’t even tell exactly which book or verse that was from! So I just keep repeating that one miserable verse over and over. That, and ‘Hey-sus’.

I say angrily to the Holy Spirit, “Aren’t you supposed to bring to remembrance all that Jesus has taught me?! If ever there was a good time for that, it’s now!”

My demon-best-friend raises the cleaver as if to throw it at me and I, feeling so helpless, force myself to wake up because after watching ‘Nightmare On Elm Street’ just a few days ago you don’t feel like dying in your sleep. And I kid you not, when I opened my eyes, I was face-down with one arm twisted at my back.

I woke up and angrily muttered my thoughts to God,“How is it possible after 23 years of going to church, I could only muster up ONE bible verse in defense against a demon? This is ridiculous.”  Then I smiled to myself because ‘ridiculous’ sounded like ‘Riddikulus’, a curse in the Harry Potter series that wizards and witches use to expel a Boggart, a shape-shifting demon that takes the form of a person’s worst fear. Feeling guilty that I could remember a Harry Potter spell but not a bible verse, I sat up and thought of other verses. I only managed 3.

“The name of the Lord is a strong tower, the righteous run to it and they are safe.”

“He who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved.”

“Do not fear, for I, the Lord your God am with you.”

Those three verses and the story of the 5 loaves and 2 fish.

“That’s fantastic.”, I grumbled sarcastically to no one in particular, “Next time a demon threatens to slash me, I’ll just sit it down and tell it the story of how Jesus fed the five thousand.”

Why couldn’t I remember any verses? I’m not supposed to be scared right? How come I couldn’t fight back?

Sigh. I certainly didn’t feel like more than a conqueror.

Side note: I may be watching too many slasher and horror movies.

Thinking of: How I just spent one hour of my sleeping time blogging, how I need to pen my thoughts down at a more godly time, New Found Glory’s Kiss Me, how I need to read up on my ‘Defense Against the Dark Arts’ book bible and leaving for work in half an hour.

One thought on “This is Riddikulus.

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