Glorious Chaos.

Just look at them; I pull one tiny thread and their whole world unravels into chaos. Glorious chaos.

“There seems to be a kind of order in the universe, in the movement of the stars and the turning of the earth and the changing of the seasons, and even in the cycle of human life. But human life itself is almost pure chaos. Everyone takes his stance, asserts his own rights and feelings, mistaking the motives of others, and his own.”

Katherine Anne Porter

Isn’t it funny, how fast people jump to conclusions?

You don’t have to say much, but just enough to get their synapses moving to the rhythm of the speed of light.

On a side note: I wonder if the only way to trump your heart is with logic. Does this mean mind over matter isn’t just a myth? But what if it’s the matters of the heart? If you can overcome your heart with your mind, is your mind stronger than your heart?  Or is it like a balance scale where to find equilibrium one has to give in order for the other to receive? So if you use more of your mind, do you use less of your heart?

I need a job. I need it now. ‘Coz it seems the scale has been tipping in favour of my heart lately.

On another side note: I went for my first casting yesterday. I always pictured a million hopeful wanna-be’s sitting in a crowded smoke-filled room waiting for their life to begin. Everyone wants to make it to Hollywood, I guess. Of course I’m just doing it for the money. But it was just me and another girl there. Halfway through makeup and pretending to be this busy office girl ordering kuih, I was washed over with guilt and shame, I have a degree from a top ranking Australian University, wtf am I doing here?

I tell myself again, “I’m doing this for the money, Sumi.”

But jujurlah pada hatiku, I really don’t need the money. I just need a change.

On yet another side note: Swensen’s Earthquake on 50%-off-Tuesday was delicious even though towards the end, the 8 flavours kinda all tasted like one.

Thinking of: A career in tv, Chad Michael Murray, how much I’ve missed One Tree Hill, and Landon Pigg and Lucy Schwartz’s Darling I Do.

2 thoughts on “Glorious Chaos.

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