Interesting Fact: I have never owned any item of body wear that had a picture of a skull because I feared being possessed by it.
Until the 27th of October 2011.
A couple of months ago, I blogged about a girl that sprang forth a debate of ‘Secular versus spiritual, is balance really not an option?’.
My conclusion: we are permitted to do anything we please, but not everything we choose to do can be beneficial for us.
The following week after I wrote the post, my boss decides to throw a Halloween-themed day in the office. For team building, of course.
I LOVE dressing up. So when this opportunity to dress up like a Twilight vampire presented itself, that very day I drove to a costume shop. I got fake fangs, fake nails, fake blood and most importantly, glitter. That’s when I came across this:
Though I liked it at first, I hesitated buying it because I had an uneasy feeling.
A feeling which I immediately shook off by reminding myself nothing should have a hold on me because I have Jesus.
I mean, it’s just a necklace, not the ashes of Amun-Ra.
The moment I bought it, I swear I heard the soundtrack of Saw playing in the mall.
It also didn’t help that the sky was unusually dark that day because it was the night of a New Moon.
When my mother saw my vampire outfit the next day, she started la telling me how I’m glorifying satan by buying his merchandise. It bummed me out, because I hate it when I feel so condemned.
Interestingly enough, a colleague randomly approached me that day asking me if I was a Christian because she could see God’s blessing and hand of favour on me.
There I was, dripping in glitter and fake blood, wearing a shirt that said “I Kissed a Vampire and I Liked it” and a skull-head dangling from my neck, and she could still see Jesus in me.
Hope sprang anew in my heart because it was true, that outward adornment cannot cover God’s glow.
I went home that Halloween with a new spring in my step.
That feeling lasted a day.
Every night since I bought it I swear that skull was staring at me, it’s red jewels taunting my fear. Often during the day I would picture the skull in my room, making my skin crawl. At night, I dreamt it’s lifeless eyes bore upon my sleeping body. I attributed every misfortune to it, including the weird coincidence of me arguing a lot more with my mother during that period. My paranoia was getting the best of me so much so I contemplated sneaking it into my cell leaders house and see if I could monitor any changes in her life.
One 2AM-sleepless-night two horrible weeks later, I couldn’t stand its presence in my life anymore. I grabbed it, ran outside to the big garbage bin, broke it into smitherines while screaming, “I REBUKE YOU, JEWELLERY OF SATAN, IN JESUS NAME!” then ran back to my room like the hounds of hell were on my heels.
Maybe it was psychological but that thing friggin’ messed with my mind as long as it was in my possession. No matter how much I claimed victory over it, I felt no peace in my heart until it was out of my house and out of my life. Thinking about it still gives me the heebie-jeebies.
For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.
Thinking of: How dangerous swans are, Email Etiquette Training, how I wish I was stronger than this, sucky Tron: Legacy, how I don’t deserve it and Taylor Swift’s Eyes Open.